In the old days, it was not customary to have a wedding without parental blessing. This custom carries with it the wisdom of the older generation and the respect of children for their parents. They did not get married in church without the consent of their parents, otherwise children who decided to marry without the approval of their ancestors would bear the heavy burden of renouncing their family all their lives. For such couples, family life did not work out, and often completely collapsed.
If we decipher the blessing, we literally get “praise of the future.” Therefore, this ceremony is considered not only an approval of the choice of your child, but also a promise to a happy future.
Nowadays young people choose their own couple and do not ask their parents for permission to get married. All that remains of the blessing ceremony is the part where the groom’s parents bid farewell to the young people for a bright and long family life. No one remains indifferent at such a moment, parents place their hopes on their children, and the newlyweds receive support and approval from the older generation.
Orthodox blessing
If you want to undergo the ritual of Orthodox blessing according to all the canons, then find out whether all participants in the ritual are baptized. Otherwise, you will have to be baptized before the wedding. If there are no obstacles to the blessing, and everyone agrees to carry out the ceremony, then two icons are bought: the icon of the Kazan Mother of God and the icon of Christ the Savior (Nicholas the Pleasant).
The first blessing takes place by the girl's parents at her home. Parents with best wishes and with parting words they baptize the daughter three times with the icon of the Mother of God.
The bride's parents then bless the young couple. When the groom comes to pick up his betrothed on the wedding day, the bridesmaids offer him other candidates for marriage, and after refusing, they ask him for a ransom for the beautiful bride. After a noisy and cheerful ransom, the second blessing of the newlyweds is carried out. This happens before the bride and groom leave for registration (wedding). For the ceremony it is necessary to prepare an embroidered towel. Young people kneel on it in front of their parents, who hold icons in front of them. The bride's father and mother say solemn parting words and baptize the newlyweds three times with icons. When leaving the bride's house, the future spouses take the first step into new life, where they are greeted by guests and showered with grain, sweets and coins.
The groom's parents are the last to bless the spouses after marriage. Children come to their parents' house after the registry office or perform the ceremony at the entrance to the banquet hall. A “carpet of well-being” is laid under the feet of young people. The groom's mother holds a loaf with a salt shaker in her hands. The father meets the newlyweds with an icon at the threshold, he says words of blessing and wishes for a strong marriage, happy life. The young couple kiss the icon, eat bread and salt, and the blessed ones enter the house.
Modern rite of blessing
If there are any difficulties in performing the blessing, then you can abolish it. This is what many people do in our time, especially if there is a multi-ethnic marriage or one of the parents does not accept baptism for religious reasons. In this case, icons are not required. The blessing comes down to a conversation between children and their parents, in which the elders admonish the younger generation, instruct them in a successful marriage and wish them happiness and prosperity.
Of course, this ritual loses its religious component, but the warm and touching words for a young family are also important. They will lie deep in the very heart of young people and remain there forever.
What is customary to say to parents at their children’s wedding?
Each parent makes his own decision about what speech to bless his child. Who, if not mom and dad, know him best. It is important that the words come from the heart. It’s better to learn the solemn words in advance so that you don’t forget anything in the moment of excitement. There are standard words of blessing that parents have been using for many years. They contain everything that parents should say, but there is some formalism. You can write your speech, it is better if it is in prose.
Wedding after blessings
After receiving blessings from both sides, the newlyweds and their guests enter the hall for the celebration. Icons with a towel are placed on the table at which the newlyweds are sitting, and after the wedding is completed, they are carefully wrapped and transferred to the home of the young family. Now they will guard family hearth and will become a family heirloom.
At the end of the wedding celebration, a blessing ceremony will be very symbolic and beautiful for everyone who is present at the wedding. The matchmakers go around all the guests and pass the flame from their candle to them, lighting many other smaller ones. This very beautiful action signifies the continuity of generations. Everyone receives a piece of parental warmth and love along with a little sparkle. And how the flame behaves: whether it goes out due to a draft or flares up into a big fire, depends only on us.
A wedding is a solemn and important moment in the life of the whole family. Preparation for it differs from the usual one, because it is not just registration, but a divine rite, where everything is subject to strict rules. In particular, special icons are needed to bless the young.
What is a wedding
In Orthodoxy there are only 7 sacraments, including marriage between a man and a woman. You should prepare thoroughly, because this traveling together for life. In fact, the blessing of the newlyweds used to always take place in the church; today, the ceremony with icons often becomes a separate event before the banquet. You can do it twice - once in the temple, the other for guests, if not everyone attended the wedding.
The actual blessing is not part of the ceremony; it is a centuries-old tradition. After all, previously there was no separation between the registry office and the church; the church registered births, marriages and deaths quite officially. And now this is nothing more than a tribute to fashion, in most cases. This, of course, is sad, but this is how people can gain faith.
What icons are needed for a blessing before a wedding?
For a long time, specific icons were chosen to bless children who decided to get married. This is the image of the Savior and the Mother of God (as a rule, Kazan is taken). At the end of the wedding, they remain in the family of the young, in order to then pass on to their children. Therefore, you need to buy high-quality icons, with a wide frame, under glass. Prices for such images start at 2 thousand rubles. - quite a feasible amount, considering the total costs of the celebration. For the wedding you will need something else:
- Special candles (long and curly).
- Rings (regular gold ones are fine).
- Towels (two for icons, one for a loaf, one for a ritual).
It is also required to first register the marriage; both young people must have crosses and be baptized in the Orthodox Church.
Icon of the Virgin Mary
The Kazan image is one of the most famous; it is believed that it was he who defended Russia during the Polish invasion. This is a shoulder-length image of the Mother of God and the Child. Before the image, they pray for childbearing, protection of the home, and contact in case of any difficulties. The Kazan Mother of God is considered miraculous.
Savior Almighty
The Savior, depicted half-length, holds the Gospel and blesses the believers with his right hand. Jesus Christ is the merciful intercessor of all believers. A quotation from the Bible is usually written on an open book. You can read any prayers before it. The image of the Savior is usually used to bless the groom, and the Mother of God - to the bride.
Today folding ones are sold, the so-called wedding couple - these are two icons together that can be folded.
Blessing with icons before the wedding
Such a ritual also exists, it is performed at will. In the groom's house he is blessed with the image of the Savior, the bride - with the icon of the Virgin Mary. With this, the parents give their consent to the marriage and call on God’s help for the new family. There are other rituals, but they repeat some church wedding, so they are not at all necessary.
The young man and woman must accept the blessing by bowing their heads or kneeling, then cross themselves and venerate the edge of the icon. You cannot kiss faces, only the hand or just the edge of the image.
Today, for many, these are simply meaningless actions, a tribute to traditions or a desire to please believing parents. In fact, the blessing of the father and mother plays a huge role. After all, God has entrusted them with responsibility for their children and given them certain authority over them. Therefore, the prayer of parents has great power and is valued before the Lord.
Before registration
The blessing can be carried out several times, it depends on the wishes of the spouses, on the local and family traditions. In the presence of all guests, as well as godparents, this can be done in front of the registry office.
One of the parents reads a prayer, then an icon is taken for a wedding blessing, and the bride and groom are blessed with it three times. The young people stand face to face and pray together with everyone else. Then they should express gratitude for the constant care, for agreeing to their union. After this, the guests also give a good farewell and throw grain and small coins.
How does the ceremony take place?
If it is decided to meet the newlyweds at the entrance to the banquet hall, you need to decide on the roles in advance. There are no hard and fast rules, there may be different options:
- The groom's father holds an icon, the bride's father holds a loaf.
- Icons (one at a time) can be held by either fathers or mothers on both sides.
- One of the parents is holding the image, another is holding a loaf, the other two are holding a glass of champagne.
Then the parents take turns saying parting words- here everyone focuses on what they consider the most important. Then the parents should bless the newlyweds with the icon. To do this, the sign of the cross is drawn in the air with the icon, only in a mirror image. If you are not sure, you can watch the video of how the priests bless you in the temple.
May God's mercy be upon the young!
Wedding blessing text
Lord Jesus Christ, Son of God, prayers for the sake of Your Most Pure Mother
Hear me, Thy sinful and unworthy servant.
Lord, my children (names) are in Your mercy, have mercy and save them for Your name’s sake.
Lord, forgive them all the sins, voluntary and involuntary, that they committed before You.
Lord, guide them on the true path of Your commandments and enlighten them and enlighten them with Your light of Christ, for the salvation of the soul and the healing of the body.
Lord, bless them in the house, around the house, at school, in the field, at work and on the road, and in every place of Your possession.
Lord, protect them under the shelter of Your Saints from a flying bullet, arrow, knife, sword, poison, fire, flood, from a deadly plague (atomic rays) and from vain death.
Lord, protect them from visible and invisible enemies, from all troubles, evils and misfortunes. Lord, heal them from all diseases, cleanse them from all filth (wine, tobacco, drugs) and ease their mental suffering and sorrow.
Lord, grant them the grace of Your Holy Spirit for many years of life, health and chastity.
Lord, increase and strengthen their mental abilities and physical strength.
Lord, give them Your blessing for a godly family life and
godly childbearing.
Lord, grant me, Thy unworthy and sinful servant, a parental blessing on my child at this time of morning, day, evening and night for the sake of Thy name, for Thy Kingdom is eternal, omnipotent and omnipotent.
Amen.
Icons for blessing the newlyweds before the wedding was last modified: July 7th, 2017 by Bogolub
Marriage is the union of two loving hearts. Traditionally, it so happens that the newlyweds are blessed for a happy and long life together. In ancient times, if a couple did not receive blessings from their parents, they refused to marry the newlyweds. The ritual of blessing is considered sacred and is revered in modern world. Let's talk about how to properly bless children for marriage, who should do it, and what icons should be used.
The main thing in the article
Who should bless the newlyweds before the wedding?
A wedding is a significant event for both the groom and the bride. After all, after this day they will forever be bound by marital ties. This day is also trembling and exciting for parents, since they are giving their “little blood” into “strange” hands and it is unknown how the relationship in the family will develop further. Therefore, at every wedding, parents say parting words for a new life to the young. This parting word is called parental blessing.
Parents are the most dear people who gave life. They simply cannot wish anything bad for their child, and no matter how difficult it is, they choose the warmest, deepest and most tender words that come from the heart. Therefore, this rite is considered sacred, and during the blessing, icons with the faces of saints are used. From time immemorial there has been a tradition of blessing the bride and groom before the wedding by the latter's parents. But the couple receives a blessing from the groom’s parents after the painting or wedding.
When should we bless the young?
The couple receives an official blessing in How does this happen? The young man comes for the bride and the first thing he does is buy her from his girlfriends and relatives. After the ransom is completed, when the groom has “proved” that he is ready to give everything for his beloved, the young woman is released to the groom and preparations begin for the Wedding Palace or church for the wedding. Before leaving, the future father-in-law and mother-in-law bless the newlyweds with the icon, wishing them happy and long life married life.
Regarding blessings from the groom's parents, then they receive it after the painting or wedding, upon arrival home (V modern interpretation- this is the restaurant where the banquet takes place). They meet the newlyweds with icons and give parting words not only to the son, but also to the “acquired” daughter. Since the bride is part of this family, the groom's parents, with their blessing, recognize her as part of their family and commit to her as their child.
As the ancient belief says: “only after parental blessing can a strong, real and happy family" After all, it is believed that the parent’s word is endowed with mysterious power and how it is pronounced will affect the future of the new family.
Where are the young blessed?
It was already noted above that the bride and groom receive two blessings on their wedding day:
- the first from the bride's parents before the trip to the registry office (church);
- the second from the groom's parents after the ceremony.
Accordingly, the answer to the question of where the blessing ceremony should take place is simple. The young people receive their first parting words in the bride's parental home, and the newlyweds who have already taken place receive the second blessing at the house of the groom's parents. Since in the modern world they practically no longer “walk with the whole village” in a hut in their parents’ house, parting words from the father-in-law and mother-in-law are often received in a restaurant where a banquet has been ordered for the guests.
What icon do the bride's parents bless the newlyweds with?
It is customary for the parents of a young person to give their parting words while holding in their hands Icon of the Kazan Mother of God.
In the Orthodox Church we especially honor this image, since the Mother of God was, and is still considered, an intercessor Slavic people. Such an icon is considered female, because they pray that it will protect the house from evil forces and misfortunes.
Interesting fact: At the instigation of Patriarch Kirill of Moscow, the holy image of the Kazan Mother of God was sent into space in 2011.
What icon do the groom's parents bless the newlyweds with?
As for the meeting of the newlyweds by the groom's parents, this happens with icon of the Savior
in hands. In Orthodoxy, such an image has the name Savior Almighty; the icon depicts the Son of God, who holds the open Gospel in one hand, and with the other gives a blessing to everyone looking at him. They turn to this icon both in difficult times and in moments of joy, and also pray for the well-being of the family.
Traditionally in Rus', this icon was the first to be brought into the newlyweds’ house.
Today, it is allowed for the newlyweds to meet the parents of both the groom and the bride after the wedding ceremony. At such a meeting, two icons are held in their hands (the icon of the Kazan Mother of God is brought to the restaurant by the bride’s parents), but the ceremony of blessing is carried out by the groom’s parents in the face of the Savior.
How to properly bless the groom's young parents?
There can be two scenarios for blessing newlyweds who have already taken place.
- In the first version, only the parents of the young man greet the couple with the icon of the Savior.
- In the second, the parents of both the bride and groom greet the newlyweds with two icons.
The images must be wearing towels, since it is not recommended to take them with bare hands. By tradition The image of the Savior is held by the groom's father. He speaks parting words first, then gives his blessing to the mother. The newlyweds cross themselves with the icon three times, and the groom is allowed to kiss the image first, then the bride.
If both sets of parents are meeting, then the father of the groom and the mother of the bride can be placed in the center with icons. And on the sides, for example, the father of the bride with champagne and the mother of the groom with a loaf of bread. In that case, blessing new family They can give it to both pairs of parents in turn and bless them with two icons, baptizing the young three times and letting them kiss the icons in turn, starting with the groom. After the blessing ceremony, the newlyweds are served a loaf and salt, as well as glasses and champagne.
How should the bride's young parents be blessed?
The first blessing, held before going to the registry office or church, is held at the bride's home, after the groom has passed all the tests. It can be carried out in different ways.
- If you follow all the rules and traditions, then only the bride and groom, parents and godparents are present at the blessing.
- Modern rules are not so “strict”, so everyone participating in the ransom and guests are invited to the blessing ceremony.
The blessing itself goes as follows. The girl’s father gives the mother an icon of the Mother of God, the mother takes it with a towel and gives a parting speech to her daughter and son-in-law, after which the father speaks. At the end of the speech, the girl’s mother baptizes her daughter with the icon three times, then her son-in-law three times. In conclusion, the two young people are baptized with the icon three times, thereby the mother-in-law recognizes that they are a couple. Next, he gives the icon a kiss, first to his daughter, then to his son-in-law. Young people must cross themselves before leaning against the image.
What should you say when blessing the newlyweds for a happy marriage in front of the registry office?
There are no specific words for blessing. Parents speak from pure heart everything that the newlyweds want to wish. They also give instructions for further life together, wish you long happy years married life. When blessing, speech is limited only by the imagination of parents who wish only good things for their children. For example, you can look at the texts of blessings parents give to their children.
Words of blessing from mother to daughter before wedding: text
Words of blessing from mother to son before wedding: text
Words of blessing from the mother of the groom to the newlyweds at the wedding: text
Words of blessing from the mother of the bride to the newlyweds at the wedding: text
Video: How to bless the young?
Well, to summarize, we note that after the wedding, the icons remain in the family of the newlyweds. They become a family heirloom, which is designed to protect and protect this family from adversity, disease and sadness. Believers place images in the corner or above the bed. Those who are not so devout keep the icons in a certain place without displaying them. According to tradition, these icons are inherited by children at their wedding.
Here is a short excursion into the traditions and rituals of blessing young parents; perhaps you will be interested in reading about this too.
***********
Dear children, as we guide you into your new life, we wish you love, happiness, family well-being. Live in the name of goodness and love. We bless you for a happy marriage and a strong family!
***********
Dear children, (name of the groom) and (name of the bride)! We bless you on strong marriage, on friendly family. Live in peace and friendship, love and harmony, for your own happiness and for the joy of people! Let the children in your family laugh, let there be peace and prosperity in your home!
***********
Today we wish you happiness, May the Lord protect you from storms and bad weather,
Human language, from pain and illness, From hard years, from a vicious circle.
And may the Lord give you a lot of passion, enthusiasm, ardor and love! And a lot of happiness!
***********
Dear children! We are ready to wish you everything that you would wish for yourself:
Health, joy, happy days and many smart children!
May the sun always shine pleasantly on you, May the blessed rain pour over your head,
We wish you with all our hearts, with all our soul: Prosperity, harmony, love, peace!
Words of blessing at a wedding
Congratulations on your wedding day, we wish you happiness, health, goodness.
Let misfortune not touch you, Let trouble not notice you -
Congratulating you on this bright day, We wish you a long and happy life,
I wish you passionate and beautiful love, so that the shadows do not cover misfortunes.
We wish you only success in your worries, so that the house rings with songs, joyful laughter,
So that a child’s smile warms your heart, So that nothing hurts you,
And so that adversity does not touch you, It seems like minutes for many years!
***********
We wish you health, a lot of happiness, May joy and dreams be nearby,
May good luck accompany you, and may kindness never leave your home!
***********
We wish the young: If there is land, then more,
If the garden is rich, If the hut is good,
If the cow is fair, if the daughter is beautiful,
If the son is strong, If the grief is small,
If happiness is eternal!
***********
Two doves, our dear children! All the best to you, all earthly happiness, prosperity and tranquility to your home, strong prosperity, strong family.
We wish you happiness young
And health and good luck -
Be a good housewife
And a beautiful young woman.
To the young groom -
Happiness, joy in the house,
So that the family does not become poor,
So that the work is in full swing,
So that the wife gives birth to seven heroes on time -
Seven handsome sons.
And the girls don’t interfere -
They run the entire farm!
Take care and respect each other, happiness and love to you!
***********
Dear bride and groom! On this happy day you stand on the threshold of a new life. Just a little more and you will become husband and wife! Before you start family life Please accept our parental instructions and congratulations!
Live together
Peaceful, okay!
Take care of love,
Strengthen your family
Give birth to children
Keep it good!
I wish you great happiness, great love, considerable wealth. Prosperity and joy to your family!
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A traditional wedding is full of rituals. The union of young people with each other is invariably associated with the tradition of parental blessing. Why is this moment present in the culture of peoples? A girl or boy grew up and was raised in a family, so parents “open the gate” to a new adult life. A wedding is considered a major step towards independence. Two people create a union, which is still a separate cell.
A separate tradition, pleasant for everyone (young people, relatives, guests), is the presentation of gifts. In modern society, it is customary to give money, jewelry, household appliances, and bed linen, but the ritual of blessing the newlyweds with a miraculous icon is still preserved. This ritual dates back to the baptism of Rus' and is the main point of the celebration. The icon given by parents was passed down from one generation to another.
What is the value of the ritual with an icon?
A wedding is the beginning of a new union, ideally life-long. Therefore, parental guidance serves to strengthen the foundation of the future happiness of the young. Along with congratulations, there are wishes, instructions and blessings from the father and mother. Their task is to help at the first stage to create a microclimate in the family.
Now there is a gradual return to ancient traditions. They are not only beautiful, but also contain a storehouse of ancestral wisdom. Blessing with an icon belongs to the Christian values of marriage, which also strengthen its position in society.
Preliminary preparation for the wedding
Improvisation at a wedding is encouraged, especially if it is successful, but most of the congratulations, gifts, and parting words should be prepared in advance. A search and development of a script is carried out, relatives and guests discuss the stages of the celebration among themselves, based on the plans of the young people.
Carrying out a celebration according to tradition requires friends and relatives to prepare scenes and ditties. The presence of music and equipment, definition from the menu, is important. All participants in the event, especially parents, should contribute. They are required to prepare words of congratulations and parting words.
Which icon to bless the newlyweds
What kind of icon do parents usually give to newlyweds for their wedding? The bride's father and mother bless her with the Image and sincerely wish her happiness and wisdom. To carry out the ritual, you need an image of the Kazan Mother of God, which should be presented holding it on an embroidered towel. The icon personifies the image of a woman preserving the family hearth as a spouse and mother. The bride, bowing before the image, looks at it. In this case, the head should be covered with tulle and guipure. The girl makes a promise to protect her family.
The groom's parents bless him with the Image of Christ. The task of a man in a family is to protect it. He makes the final decisions as the head of the family. Although the wife is called the “neck”, who carefully and imperceptibly turns the (man’s) head in the desired direction, according to tradition, the last word remains with him. If he rules incorrectly, if he is a reckless reveler, then the family will suffer. The groom must understand his obligations.
Features of preparing and conducting the blessing ritual
Parents perform the ceremony at home. It is not customary to receive images from friends. An icon for blessing should be purchased consecrated in a temple or monastery. Before the wedding, parents visit these monasteries of God to pray for the prosperous future family life of their children, and purchase an icon. Together with the Image, they bring peace and grace to the house.
It is permissible to bring the images to the registry office during the wedding, and then, before the start of the feast, once again greet the newlyweds with one of the icons, as a rule, the Face of Christ. The embroidered towel used to hold the icon is called a towel. Then the hands of the young people are tied. The role of uniting the bride and groom is assigned to the parents, therefore the image of Christ is used in this ritual. The father greets the newlyweds, holding an icon, and the groom's mother meets them with bread and salt. The tradition of blessing the young with an icon and a loaf symbolizes the wish for them to have a prosperous family life, prosperity and happiness.
You should first prepare your words. It is better that parting words, wishes and congratulations come from the heart, and are not taken solely from the Internet. You can first familiarize yourself with the traditions of your ancestors and, based on them, compose your own special version of wishes. Carrying out the ritual with a pure heart is the key to its value for the future life of the young. Parents must turn to the Lord. If you lack faith, then you should sincerely wish happiness to the bride and groom. Young people starting family life are always worthy of these wishes. If there are doubts, they should have been voiced earlier. After the wedding, only wishes for happiness, healthy children, and mutual understanding should be spoken.
